This one is going to be short but I think I have been writing some serious stuff lately so I thought I would break it up with a little more light hearted and quick entry. Pleated dress pants are like the mom jeans of the men’s world. I don’t know why they still exist, it should go the way of Pantaloons or ascot. It looks kind of silly and make men look like they have a paunch and a big ass. Unless you have a Burmese Python of a johnson that needs room to slither around, stick with plain front pants. Pleats for men only belong round the cuff of a shirt, or a kilt (Don’t even think about it!).
Some of you more fashionably aware might say, “Single guy, what are you talking about? I would kill puppies if it were to get my wife to wear her Catholic High School dress again, and I think those have pleats.” I would say one, you are a bit of a dirty bastard but absolutely right pleated skirts are awesome on women, and with a little research you could find a pleated “school girl” skirt for your wife that doesn’t bring back the bad memories of HS. Since you are likely married you probably already know this, the rules that apply to men don’t apply to women. Pleats are usually best use to control fabric. For women they are awesome, pleats on skirts to make them extra swooshy and if the girl spins fast enough, the skirt lifts up (not a bad side effect), they also help accentuate curves on a woman in a full dress. For men it is fabric bunching. We don’t wear pant waists around our belly buttons anymore. We have no need for pleats to balloon around our waist. Since our waist and hips are usually the same size or hips are smaller we don’t need them. I know a tailor who said that he would make every man look like he lost 10 lbs through his custom suits. Half that secret is no more pleats.
My ass is big enough, I don’t need my clothing to help make it look bigger. Ditch the pleated dress pants, your wife will thank me for it.
About the Author: Tom is a director of IT for a financial start-up. He spends his days designing infrastructure and supporting high net worth advisers and their clients. Traveling much for work affords him a great perspective on life and what is important. The high travel has ensured that he goes on a lot of first and second dates. Mel Brooks honed his humor. Johnny Carson, Cee-lo, and Groucho Marx are some of his inspirations.