Should you Buy Flowers or Chocolate?

So we’ve talked about how to buy your wife flowers, and we’ve even talked about how to pick out gifts for your wife.  But there may come a time when you’re in the dog house, and need a quick ‘I’m sorry’ gift.  Which should it be?  Flowers or Candy?  How about neither…



These are the standard ‘go to’ gift for special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries, as well as ‘I’m sorry I was an idiot’ gifts.  You have to be careful with flowers, though.  If you *always* get flowers for birthdays or anniversaries, it just simply isn’t special anymore.  It’s like getting socks and underwear for Christmas.  Sure it’s nice – but did you really put any thought into it?   Also, flowers don’t really last that long.  Depending on your wife’s frame of mind, dying flowers could mean the dying spark in a relationship.  Don’t give her any metaphors.  Find some other way to show her that she’s special and that you love her.

Here are a few times where flowers are a perfect gift:

  • First day at a new job
  • The day after she got a big promotion
  • On a random day, just because she’s a wonderful wife, and you love her very much
  • On a day where she’s very nervous about something (big presentation at work, some sort of show that she’s putting on, etc)
  • To thank her for something that she’s done for you
  • To congratulate her for something awesome that she’s done for herself

Candy or Chocolate

Candy is another issue entirely.  Sure, Chocolate is the typical Valentine’s day gift, but that’s just it.  It’s TYPICAL.  Is your wife typical?  I didn’t think so.  Gifts should reflect who she is – not what the stores say she should be.  The other tricky part is that while women may WANT candy and chocolate…. they also want AVOID calories and unhealthy food.  If your wife has been eating nothing but oatmeal and salad with boneless, skinnless chicken breasts for the last six months, and working out 3 to 5 times per week… she may want it – she may relish it… and then she will hate herself for eating it… and hate you for tempting her with it.

Rather than candy, find her favorite tea, or another ‘treat’ that doesn’t involve a lot of sugar or calories that she allows herself to indulge in, and get those for her.  The best time to get treats like these is randomly and when you are very much in love with her.  Pick out days like:

  • Her half-birthday
  • The anniversary of the day that your kids were ‘made’ (wink wink 😉 – that can be figured out with a little math)
Don’t tell her what the day is; just keep those particular dates in your pocket for special “I love my wife and want to show her” days.  It’s easy to forget to have those special days in the throes of everyday life.  Mark those dates on your calendar and show your wife that you love her by doing something special on those days.  Your wife will pretty much always appreciate you showing her how much you love her.  It doesn’t always have to be a ‘thing’, but little surprises are never a bad idea.
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Filed Under: featuredRomance 101


About the Author: Abby Dryer's goal in life is to bridge the communication gap between men and women. She finds herself giving lots of marital advice to her guy friends whose wives don’t want to have to explain *everything* to their husbands. “Women are hard to understand. I’m a woman, and *I* don’t even get us sometimes! Goodhusbanding is a great guide to help men understand their women, and hopefully communicate with a little more confidence, because that’s what works… communication!”

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